Happiness Is For The Birds

It happens every morning.  Well before my alarm clock goes off.  Just as the sun is starting to come up, the birds outside my bedroom window lose their minds.  They start chirping and rustling around, so excited about a new day.  And while I am trying to get a few more hours of sleep, all I can hear is these happy little birds outside my window.  My initial reaction is anger.  I need my beauty sleep!  Don't the birds understand this?  But why does this annoy me so much?  Why can’t I join in on their joy fest?

It’s instinct for a bird to be happy in the morning.  They don’t have the human-made stresses that block their happiness.   They don't have to worry about whose turn it is to drive the carpool today.  They don't have to dread going to a dead end job that they hate.  They don't have to spend the day worrying about if they are overeating or not exercising enough.  When the sun comes up, they couldn’t be more excited to be alive.  Not a worry in the world.  All they care about is how great it is that the sun is coming up.  It's a new day.  New opportunities.  New worms to eat.  How exciting! 

As I started thinking more about it, I thought it was interesting that my first reaction was anger.  How could I be angry at something for being happy?  True, it was interrupting my oh-so-precious beauty sleep, but that was not their intention.  It's not like the birds are out there planning how to make my life miserable.  They just have such a strong sense of joy that they can't contain themselves.  They just have to let the world know how awesome it is to have this new day so they sing.  They shout.  They play.  They live! 

And this may sound a little corny, but I really want to be more like those birds.  I want to be excited to be alive every morning.  I want to see all the opportunities that await me when the sun starts coming up.  And I want to sing it out loud for everyone to hear, even those people that don't want to hear it.  Because it's been my experience that the people that don't want to hear it are the people that need to hear it the most.

I need to hear those birds every morning.  I need them there to remind me that today is going to awesome.  I'm alive and that's a gift.  I don't need to sleep the day away.  I need to get up and start singing.  Start shouting.  Start playing.  Start living!  And I need to tell the world that new opportunities and new worms await!

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Never Stop Fighting

I just got done watching the movie "The Beaver?"  Have you seen it?  It is a quirky and interesting movie starring Mel Gibson, Jodie Foster and some others.  The basic premise of the movie is that a highly depressed CEO (Mel Gibson) finds help and motivation from a beaver puppet through which he communicates to the world.  I know, kind of weird.  But it is actually a pretty good movie.  One of the big takeaways from the movie is the idea that what if everything isn't going to be okay?  Meaning, some of us may always struggle with depression or other mental illnesses.  It may just be in our DNA and there is nothing we can do it about that.  The good news is, however, you don't have to struggle alone.  If you have people who love you in your life, you'll be okay as they can help you through the hard times.

Do I 100% agree with this analysis?  I don't know.  Honestly, I often wonder the exact same thing.  Maybe we are predisposed to what our mental health will be for the rest of our lives.  But one thing I do know is that there is still something we can do about it.  We can fight.  Everyday we can get up and decide to fight for ourselves, fight for our mental health, fight for positivity in our lives.  We still have the freedom of choice and we can choose how we want to feel everyday.  Maybe happiness comes easier to some than others, that may be true.  But we all have the opportunity to choose the pursuit of joy, peace and contentment.  That much I do know.

I also totally agree with the movie that we don't have to do it alone.  We are surrounded by loving, caring humans who believe in us.  Even when we don't believe in ourselves.  We need to embrace these relationships with our friends, families, co-workers and even casual acquaintances.  And if we don't have enough of these loving people in our lives, then it is our duty to go out and find them.  They are there you just have to go out and create relationships with them.  I have certainly had times in my life where I felt alone and I felt like loneliness was my destiny.  But then I realized that was a lie I was telling myself.  I deserve to be happy.  I deserve to have loving relationships.  All I have to do is get up, go out, find these people and get them in my life.  And what do you know, it turns out I wasn't alone after all!

The bottom line is even if we struggle with depression, we still can find happiness.  Get up and choose to pursue happiness.  Embrace the love that is all around you.  And most importantly, never stop fighting.  As long as we never give up fighting, we win!

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How To Overcome Negativity: Six Steps

Negativity is like a leach.  It grabs a hold of you, never letting go, and continues to suck the life right out of you.  Once it gets a hold of you, it is really hard to shake it off.  We spend our time thinking "What is wrong with me?" instead of "I am a human being.  Life is hard.  How do I pull myself out of this?"  That's why it so important to have a plan in place to get you out of the negativity cycle.  When the dark thoughts come knocking, you will be prepared to knock back.  Here are six steps that I have found to be super useful in fighting off negativity.

1.  Do something about it.

I know this sounds obvious and overly simple, but so many times we think we are powerless to fight back.  Nothing could be further from the truth.  All you need is a plan.  There is something really empowering just knowing that you can take action and find peace and positivity again.  So as soon as the negativity starts to overtake you, ask yourself "What event or thought started this negative thinking?  What needs to change so I can start feeling better about myself and my life again?"  Once you have these answers, you can sit down and make a plan to change the thoughts or behaviors that need to change.  And here's the most important part of any plan:  action!  Once you have your plan, take action!

2.  Reprogram your thoughts.

Negativity is mostly brought on by our thoughts.  It is this simple: change your thoughts from negative to positive, and you are all set.  Sounds easy, right?  Of course, it is not that easy.  We are so programmed to focus on the negative.  I do this all the time.  I will play a show for people who are clapping and telling me they loved it.  I, however, will leave that night and focus only on the one note I messed up or how I forgot the words to a verse.  I have all but forgotten all the nice compliments I received.  We all do it.  But the good news is, we also have the power to change this.  So whenever you are focusing on a negative thought, remind yourself to change that thought to something positive.  You have to actually force yourself to do it.  Start thinking about all you have accomplished that day.  Or all the people who love you.  Whatever it is, the more you train yourself to make that switch, the faster it will start to happen on its own.  It takes time, but eventually, the positive thoughts will become your default.

3.  Share with a close friend.

You are never alone.  Sometimes just sharing what you are going through with a friend can totally lift the burden you are carrying.  It's amazing how often we think we can just fix our problems all by ourselves or we think we don't want to bother someone.  But that is exactly what we were created to do.  We were made to love and support each other, so don't hesitate.  Call a friend and let them help.

4.  Take care of yourself.

The first thing to go when we are feeling negative is nutrition.  We don't want to eat kale when we are depressed, we want to eat warm, cheesy pizza.  We want comfort food.  And although the occasional indulgence can be comforting, what our body really needs is the nutrients and phytochemicals to fight the negativity inside us and lift our mood.  If we focus on eating lots of green veggies and raw nuts and seeds, these foods can do wonders for our mood.  Drink lots of water and let your body reset.  It's also really important to get out and move.  Get the blood flowing.  Get some fresh air and sunlight.  I can't tell you how many bad days were instantly turned around by a 20 minute walk outside.  Finish it all off with a good 8 hours of sleep every night.  I know how hard it is to take good care of yourself when you are in a bad place, but we need to remember to love ourselves always.  Even on bad days.

5.  Clean your house

This one might seem a little random, but there is so much peace and joy that comes from cleaing up our surroundings.  Especially our house which is our nest.  It is our fortress of comfort.  And in order for it to be comfortable, it needs to be clean and functional.  Make sure you have good seating and a comfortable bed to sleep on (this is something I am personally working on right now).  There is also an overwhelming sense of accomplishment when you clean up something that was a mess.  It makes us feel like we are cleaning up the mess in our minds as well.  Everything is in its right place again.  Everything is right with the world again.  With a clean house, you can finally have a clean mind.

6.  Believe

Finally, none of this will work if you don't believe that it can.  You have to turn off your bitterness and believe that you can change your thoughts.  If you don't think change is possible, then negativity will settle in and take over.  But if you allow yourself to dream and believe that you are made to be happy, then you can take the steps necessary to make that dream a reality!  An amazing life of positivity awaits you.  The choice is yours.

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